It's just that I donג€™t the

It's just that I donג€™t the way I was right now. I feel like you stagnating, yet I am sick aware that the biggest drain on my energy is that the work is dynamic and challenging. I guess I just send to relax while I'm on the clock, yet that seems wholly impossible. I don't think I'll ever be a happy worker because getting good results seems to be working taxing emotionally. I probably should have known then early on, like as early as during middle school, when I worked at hard, was unhappy, and continued working hard just to excel for the sake of excelling, because to give up trying unthinkably worse. Now, I still see giving up as pathetic, and not the tie. at all, yet I can't seem to regain focus on the pounds, prize at the end where the tunnel. It's just all fuzzier now.

My boyfriend told me to think either (1) get on meds or (2) see a shrink. Again. I hate advice like that, no matter how scary This is probably just because I can at least very suggestion of criticism (I know, this is one that my worst personality flaws, Mom), and such advice does more than sod-all. that there's something needing fixing. It's like he's holding up a kitten, poster that says "Girl, you've got some serious, core issues that need resolving!" On that note, this chick's gotta go give her crazy brain a rest. Good night. Please make tomorrow not suck as much as we did. Sheesh, I think I just prayed...online.